signage

a red car painted like a cow

In Kreuzberg is a red car painted like a cow and, nearby, a GATOR CROSSING road sign. Vines growing all over the side of a building remind me of my ongoing battle with body hair.

In the Thai restaurant Manuel takes me to the toilets number two, one labeled SEXYLADY below a super-femme silhouette, the other with LADYBOY beneath an intersex symbol. The menu features German-language Thai food puns, which Manuel explains but not so well that they stick for the permanent record.

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this idiot cat

Last night I got back to the borrowed flat and found this idiot cat that used to live in said flat and thinks it still does waiting for me on the borrowed bed where I’m sleeping; later, retiring, I found that said cat had peed on said bed, like, with authority, and volume.
I spent much of the night not sleeping but disassembling and washing, and when I got up to resume that work this morning, the same cat was waiting for me in the living room in spite of having been thrown thoroughly out.
Now I have posted signs on all the points of feline ingress I can divine reading MIKE IF YOU COME IN HERE AGAIN I WILL DROWN YOU and the same again, just in case, in German.

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the petite typo

The petit typo on ma nouvelle pancarte that I got pissed at Per for trying to point out when I was already done with the laborious markering for a fourth time turns out to have been a missing N.

BESOIN DE PARLER?

UNE OREILLE ATTENTIVE

À VOTRE DISPOSITION.

ANGLAIS OU FRAÇAIS,

ET GRATUIT.

Oops.

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