attention

shades at nine

Now I have put on my shades, which will allow me to stare more at anyone or anything or nothing and attract less attention for it and also be less vulnerable to engagement with other humans, which I am mostly not ready for, than I might be without them. Bless this endless daylight that lets shades close to nine, post-meridiem, remain a reasonable proposition.

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on the business of monogamy

On the business of monogamy, et cetera, I am out in the world and see the way—in country after country—national divides be damned—men look at me in spite of being manifestly, obviously with another woman in that moment, and I see the women pretending not to notice…or actually not noticing…or noticing and being mad, or hurt…or noticing and being too tired to care…and I don’t like any of those options. 

I want to only be in things that are sparkling and new and all-consuming.

Unreasonable, I guess. 

Or is it? 

Maybe only if I want to build something over decades instead of just inhabiting a string of moments. 

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